"Every strike brings me closer to the next home run"--Babe Ruth
"Tonight I need that woman again, what I'd give for my baby to just walk in, sit down beside me and say it's alright, take me home and make sweet love to me tonight"--Merle Haggard~Misery and Gin~
"Thank God and Greyhound she's gone!"--Roy Clark
Handbook to Kansas---What to Take:
"Let your trunk, if you have to buy one, be of moderate size and of the strongest make. Test it by throwing it from the top of a three-storied house: if you pick it up uninjured, it will do to go to Kansas. Not otherwise!"--Redpath and Hinton
"How come there's only one Monopolies Commission?"--Nigel Rees
"God made big men and little men, but Mr. Colt made eveners"--Unknown
Mudd flowed up into Lumps pajamas, she totally confused all the passing piranahs"--Presidents of the United States of America"~Lump~
"It's a No Dick Day"--Karen Webster
"Niggers and Okies upstairs"--Sign posted outside a Bakersfield movie theater-1930's
"Things have a life of their own. It's simply a matter of waking up their souls."--A Gypsy with an accent
"I've been all around the world and found that only stupid people are breeding"--Harvey Danger ~Flagpole Statta~
"God sleeps in minerals, awakens in plants, walks in animals and thinks in man"--4th century BC
Obituary in the "Witchita Eagle" (1891)
"As a saint, Sam Wood was bright, but as a sinner, miserable, dirty and unreliable...Upon the whole, his life was a queer admixture of joke and uncommon earnestness, of the lowest comedy and of the highest tragedy"
Communism: Man exploiting man.
Capitalism: The opposite of Communism.
"Swans sing before they die: 'twere no bad thing,
Should certain persons die before they sing."--Samuel Coleridge
"My hat don't hang on the same nail too long, my ears can't stand to hear the same old song"-- Merle Haggard~Rambl'n Fever~
"A cynic is one who knows the price of everything and the value of nothing"--Oscar Wilde
"The vilest deeds like poison weeds, Bloom well in prison-air"--Oscar Wilde in The Ballad of Reading Gaol--Part V-Paragraph V
Our Lips and Ears--Anonymous
"If you your lips would keep from slips,
Five things observe with care:
Of whom you speak, to whom you speak,
and how and when and where.
If you your ears would save from jeers,
These things keep mildly hid:
Myslef and I, and mine and my,
And how I do and did.
"The desk clerk said he saw it all real clear, He never hit the brakes and he was shifting gears"--Garth Brooks
"The good thing about the future is that is only comes one day at a time"--Abraham Lincoln
"Peel me off this velcro couch and get me moving, I sure as hell can't do it by myself"--Green Day